One fine sunny day President Barack Obama was sitting behind his desk studiously writing on some envelopes when Vice President Joe Biden walked in.“What’s up big dawg,” quipped the veep.“Oh, hi Joe. I’m just working on my three letters,” replied the President.Joe took a step back and looked around before closing the door to the…
Tag: Humor
You know you’re in California…
So as not to be outdone by all the redneck, hillbilly, and Texan jokes, somebody had to come up with this, you know you’re from California if: 1. Your coworker has 8 body piercings and none are visible. 2. You make over $300,000 and still can’t afford a house. 3. You take a bus and…
My favorite web comic
As a programmer I find some things funny that others do not. A prime example is the web comic xkcd. Look below to see a prime example of the humor that is xkcd. If you hold your mouse over the image you will see the rest of the joke. My wife finds no humor in…
If beer money worked like taxes
I know this has been floating around the Internet for many years but it is such a great illustration of how the American tax system works that I would like to share it. Suppose that every day, ten men go out for beer and the bill for all ten comes to $100.If they paid their…
Toilet Spy and other strangeness
I found this image on flickr today while searching for images tagged “Spy”. It is from an employee-only men’s bathroom in a Berlin office building. I wonder if there is another wall like this in the ladies room? This ice toilet was setup by Microsoft, to promote Windows Vista, in Dundas Square I can’t say…
Do you suffer with MADD?
Not too long ago my wife told me about a disorder she had read about on a blog. It was called Male Attention Deficit Disorder or MADD for short. The idea behind this disorder is that men can not track a conversation with a women if too many sentences are thrown at them. When a…
The Fort Dix MP
I recently had this story told to me so I claim no ownership of it. Back in the 60’s when the Army still had problems with racial issues a group of soldiers were preparing to leave Fort Dix on pass for the weekend. That’s right, on pass. I know most bases no longer use the…
1100 Reasons programing is better than having a girlfriend
You need to be a programmer to understand these:0001. No matter how many times you call an “X” no one gets jealous.0010. Using the same line over and over again always works!0011. Accurate comments make everyone happy.0100. If something is not working correctly you can always change the source code.0101. Programs don’t get offended if…
Rules of the Road
In the Steve Jackson game Car Wars there is a well known slogan: “The right of way goes to the car with the biggest guns“, followed closely by, “Drive offensively“. These two short quips work well enough in gaming but they do not work so well in real life. Over the many years I have…
When did Jenny become a plumber?
If you were around in the 80’s you probably remember Jenny and her phone number “867-5309”. Tommy “Tutone” Heath penned the famous rock song in 1982 and after the previous owner of the phone number, Brown University gave it up after growing weary of the constant prank calls, it was acquired by a plumbing company…